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April Fools Day – Guitar Bollocks Special

gibson broken headstock

With April Fools Day just gone, we thought I would share a few of our favorite Guitar themed pranks from the last few years and also the best of this year’s crop.

Electro-Harmonix ‘BAG9 Bagpipe Machine’.

ehx-bagpipe-april-fools

Mad Mike Mathews and his knob twiddling disciples at Electro-Harmonix have always kept us smiling even when it’s not April Fools day.

Anyone that names a pedal a ‘Big Muff’ got is the right side of crazy in the world of the too serious music industry.

In 2018 they launched the BAG9 bagpipe Machine with the following blurb:

“Now you don’t need the real McCoy to annoy the daylights out of your neighbors and family. The BAG9 gives you nine 100% authentic—and probably analog—bagpipe sounds, with modes ranging from Braveheart to the cheeky Kilt Lifter”.

“Increase your gigs, as the BAG9 will give you access to play funerals, parades, battlefields and any number of drunk bar gigs on St Patrick’s Day.”

AC/DC cover bands around the world got excited for a minute at the prospect of being able to do ‘It’s a long way to the top’.

Oh well here’s a vid to keep you going with the brilliant Bon Scott having a right old blow of the pipes.

 

JPTR FX ‘Metal Zone 3000T’.

jptr-metal-zone-april-fools

Pork loving German company JPTR came out with this great prank in 2017 and asked?

“Want a souped-up Metal Zone with three footswitches and four toggles that probably do nothing”?

“How about a “Distortion” knob that goes from MAX all the way up to MAX”?

“JPTR FX’s 3000T will sort you out in a jiffy”.

“This is our remake of one of the influential pedal classics of metal history.”

and those experts at Keeley Guitar Effects updated the prank a couple of years ago with their version.

Keeley’s ‘MT-2019’.

keeley-boss-mod-april-fools

Here’s what they had to say in their 2019 launch of their modded Boss MT-2.

“Lots of people have asked for it, and we’re proud to announce that we’ll be bringing back mods”!

“Well.. Only one. But it’s the moddiest mod of all mods”!

Introducing the MT-2019, offering a switch for every frequency. (Run it in the effects loop for maximum tonal shapeage!)

Marshall’s ‘Invisi-Series’

marshall amps

Back in 2019 Marshall Amps presented there new ‘Invisi-series’ taking the meaning of a transparent tone to a whole new level!

Their blurb ran with the following:

“Marshall’s new Invisi-series amps promise to give you that classic 4×12 tone in full, unadulterated form”.

“Ever wondered how so many bands play without amps on stage? It’s time to reveal the secret”…

“Introducing the Invisi-series from Marshall”.

This year they’ve been at it again by offering the

Marshall ’46-channel footswitch’.

 

marshall 46 channel footswitch

 

On a video released on their Instagram page they launched a new 46 channel footswitch and from the screenshot above had the switches labeled up for prank settings such as ‘more cowbell’, ‘autotune’ and even ‘more talent’. Now if they had one with a switch of ‘Turn the F’ing bass down’ that would sell.

Gibson ‘Broken-Neck Limited-Edition Les Paul’.

Gibson Broken Headstock Les Paul

Back in 2018 Gibson CEO Henry Juszkiewicz revealed the company is gearing up to release a limited-edition series of broken-neck Gibson Les Paul guitars.

He said:

“I stumbled upon an article in which Kirk from Metallica talked about his famous Les Paul, the one that once belonged to Peter Green and Gary Moore. The guitar got its headstock broken off when Gary Moore was involved in a car accident. During this interview, Mr Hammett said that Les Pauls always sound better when you break their neck and repair them”.

“That’s when I got this idea. Why not do the limited edition Broken Neck Les Pauls with a DIY repair kit?

“This way we’ll have Les Paul with stronger necks and better sound. Plus, if some of the buyers turn out to be good at repairing these guitars they’ll get the chance to work for Gibson.

“We’ll soon be hiring the best guitar builders in the country and making the best Les Pauls in history. We’ll also hire the breaking professionals who will find the best ways to break off these headstocks at the perfect angle. And then we’ll put it all in a big package along with a DIY repair kit.

CEO Henry then went on to say the price was going to be $9,999

The problem was Gibson were that up their own arse hole at the time people actually thought it could be true.

The rest is history.

Jim Dunlop ‘Tortex Shred ’n Sniff’.

jim-dunlop-april-fools-scratch-sniff

In 2019 Jim Dunlop presented their Shred ’n Sniff picks.

Apparently they have been infused with the aromas of the most hipster-ish dishes out there today.

Anyone fancy Sriracha-infused poke bowl, artisanal tangelo marmalade, craft IPA (blueberry-flavored), and, of course, avocado toast. Struggling musicians won’t have to skip meals ever again.

The company said:

“These revolutionary picks combine the memory and durability of Tortex with the aromatic essence of today’s hottest culinary trends—the more furious the shred, the sweeter the smell”.

Fender ‘Ambicaster’.

fender ambicaster

One that made us smile a few years ago was the great left-hand guitar blog’s LeftyFretz‘s fantastic spoof Fender Ambicaster.

The Fender American Professional Ambicaster purported to be the first ambidextrous electric guitar.

Its unique selling point was that it had both left- and right-handed configurations in one instrument. Brilliant!

Best 2020 April Fools Day Prank Goes To:

The Chibson Hand Pick

Chibson Pick
Image credit: Chibson

The best laugh we had on this year’s Aprils fools day was courtesy of the brilliant Chibson who brought us the fantastic ‘Chibson Hand Pick’.

Chibson’s Instagram is well known for its excellent photoshop guitar puns and is really worth checking out.

Designed to tackle the problems that accompany traditional plectrums – namely getting lost in your acoustic or laundry – the Hand Pick is six times larger than other picks, with a 250mm thickness, so there’s no chance of losing it. Like, at all.

Check out the accompanying video it’s awesome.

Best of all it’s apparently available from Reverb.com for $9.99 all proceeds will be donated to the MusiCares Covid-19 Relief Fund.

Well that another load of ‘Guitar Bollocks’ for you.

Let us know your favorites April Fools Day Guitar Pranks.

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Guitar Pedal – In Your Guitar?

I Can't get up

Crazy team of guitar repairing mavericks helps poor guitarists save energy bending down.

Jack’s Instrument Services and his team of guitar obsessed knob twiddlers from good old Manchester, England have done it again. Remember the dreamy Fender Jazzmaster and its built-in delay effect that gripped the nation a couple of weeks ago. Well, now they have given hope to all the filthy dirt obsessed electric guitarists with their latest energy saving creation.

 

Guitar Pedal - In Your Guitar
Our instruments taste so good!

Since the earliest days of the first guitar pedals, one problem has plagued all guitarists around the world. Bending down to adjust the knobs on your pedals. Causing countless overworked guitarists to use valuable energy and put them at risk of developing awful back problems.

This even resulted in what many experts believe to be the cause of the awful Shoegazing outbreak in the late ’80s when thousands of guitarists got to the point of developing slouched Quasimodo postures.

Now, after over a year of careful research, planning and designing the team has created the ultimate solution.

Meet The Fuzzbeast

 

Guitar Pedal - In Your Guitar

 

They have cut a hole in a guitar and put a guitar pedal in. But not just any old pedal, no a FUZZ, and it’s based on a Zvez Fuzz Factory. The Death By Audio inspired faceplate also includes even more knobs for an octave circuit and an impressively large joystick to get your hand around.

 

Guitar Pedal - In Your Guitar

 

The drastically modified Epiphone Les Paul has been fitted with a stereo output with the power running down one side of the cable, so no need to worry about replacing batteries. It was also has been upgraded with no nonsense  Tonerider Generator zebra pickups and received a full fret dress whilst in the workshop.

 

Check the video below for a full rundown on what this beast can do.

 

Let’s hope Jack and his wood in hand clan get plenty of virtuosi Matt Bellamy wannabes calling.

They could end up starting a new genre of music altogether “Hipgazing” if they’re not careful with the likes of fellow eccentric Youtuber “Look Mum No Computer”.

He’s also not averse to chopping up guitars as with his real Gibson Les Paul Synth Monster.

He states in his video that “some of you might be saying, ‘why the heck have you done that to a Gibson Les Paul, why didn’t you do it to a cheaper guitar?’ Well, the thing is, why would you do it to a cheaper guitar? If you’re gonna be using it, you may as well do it to the guitar you like playing.”

That’s more Rock N Rock than half of the saddos out there so I take my hat off to him.

See the video below for “Look Mum No Computer” Les Paul Synth hack job.

Great to see plenty the spirit of innovation is alive and well in this boring musical wasteland.

It’s a well known fact that many guitarists are only second to singers when it comes to suffering from a glass back. So if your one of those unfortunate souls then this may be the ideal solution for you and can contact the well regarded Jack’s Instrument Service on the link below.

jacksinstrumentservices.com

As ever let me know your thoughts in the comments below and get talking some Guitar Bollocks.